Faith
by xercesawake
Summary: Miranda and Andrea become close after Mirandas divorce. Andrea is not sure how to interpret their friendship. To her it feels like more, but it may be all in her head. Miranda is more religious than Andrea thought, making things even more confusing for her. She has her reasons for her beliefs but isnt sharing. What is she keeping from her and how does she really feel about Andrea?
1. Chapter 1

This story delves into religion and suppression a bit. Might bother some, so be forewarned. Read Authors Note for question at the end.

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Miranda and Andrea sat in the corner of a dimly lit steakhouse in east manhattan. This was the third time they had gone out to dinner together. They had done so discretely as to not draw any attention for the papers. Miranda was officially a single woman and Andrea had been working away from Runway at the New York Mirror for a few months now.

Each dinner had been surprisingly pleasant, lovely even. They told stories of their past and their dreams for the future. They told stories about falling in love with men and falling out. They told stories about their first jobs, humiliations and celebrations. It was as if they had been friends for years. The time passed between them imperceptibly.

When they stood out front it had begun to rain, they shared a space under the awning as her car waited to pull up to the curb. "Would you join me for a night cap?" Miranda asked her, her eyes sparkling and her face seeming to glow in the wet evening weather.

"I'd love to" Andrea answered her.

They got into the car together, though not without getting drenched in the rain. They laughed with each other as their makeup had begun to run down their faces. Andrea had never been invited back to Mirandas townhouse. The only time she ever been there was for work when she was with runway.

Andreas heart raced with the possibility of them being completely alone. She wasn't sure how she would handle herself. Outside of runway related business, they have never been alone together. She wasn't entirely sure if Miranda has feelings though her gut tells her its true. Andrea didn't know if she had only projected what she wished into their evenings together. For all she knew, this was how she treated most of her friends.

When they got to Mirandas home, she watched her slip off her heels and open her mini bar. It surprised her how at ease she felt with her in the silence of her town home. "Do have a seat, Andrea" she told her before grabbing a bottle of top shelf whiskey and preparing them both drinks.

She handed her a small glass of whiskey that had a cherry and an orange zest submerged amongst the alcohol. "I love a good old fashioned" the older woman smiled before taking a sip. It was strange how her eyes never left Andreas. She seemed to stare straight into her soul. "I was a bartender for awhile while I was in college".

"What are you thinking about?" Miranda asked her, noticing her flustered gaze. Andreas heart jumped in her chest. Although she felt she knew the truth about how this woman felt about her, she wasn't entirely sure if it was in her head. If she wanted it so desperately to be true that she just believed it to be.

She took a deep breath and took another sip of her drink. The bittersweet liquid warmed her from the inside and seemed to calm her nerves. "I'm thinking about how much I enjoy spending time with you" she told her. Miranda smiled and sat up, "I enjoy spending time with you too" she said, reaching over and squeezing her hand.

"It's been quite nice, hasn't it?" Miranda added. Andrea stared at her, her radiant smile, her perfect mouth, perfect teeth, her flawless skin and inhaled a shaking breath. She bit her lip hard and looked away. "May I ask you something, Miranda?" She noticed she was shaking when she brought her drink back up to her lips.

"Anything, darling" she answered, relaxing back into her couch. Andrea built up the courage and tried to will the words to her lips. "Have you ever been with a woman?" Miranda looked surprised by the question and smiled at her crookedly. "Why do you ask?" She answered with her own question.

"I'm just curious... if you've ever had feelings for another woman" Andrea could almost feel her heartbeat in her ears, thundering in her body. Never has anyone made her so nervous or self aware. Yet she wasn't afraid, she was excited, exhilarated by the moment.

Miranda looked away and sighed, her expression changed from happiness to melancholy. Andrea watched her sip her drink, watched her tongue play with the rim of the crystal. "It's a very long story" she answered finally. "Maybe one day we'll talk about it" she said quietly. She emptied her glass and looked over at Andrea.

"I'm going to have another. Would you like one?" She asked, her demeanor changing again, back to the Miranda she had been with the entire night. Andrea shook her head no. "So, the Mirror is covering the french elections this year, I see. Will you be one of their correspondents?" Andrea knew she was trying to change the subject but she wasn't ready to yet.

"I... uh, I'm not particularly interested in covering it myself. I think they'll have an opening for one of their war correspondents soon, that's what I'd like to do" Andrea answered but her mind was still on what Miranda had just said, or what she hadn't. "Did something happen, Miranda?" She asked without even thinking.

"What do you mean?" She answered, confused as she poured the whiskey over her sugar cube. "Were you a young woman?" Andrea couldn't let it go so easily, she wanted to know, she needed to know now. Miranda stiffened and she could feel the energy change. "One day we'll talk about it. I just don't want to get into it this time of night."

They finished their drinks and chatted a bit more about this and that. The rest of the night Andreas mind whirled with all of the possibilities that this long story could include. She wanted to talk about nothing else but she forced herself not to bring it up again. Miranda clearly is not ready to share yet.

"Oh look at the time, it's nearly two in the morning. I really should be getting to bed. I have a few things to take care of in the morning" Miranda told her. Andrea looked at her watch and was surprised that so much time had passed since they had gotten to her house.

"I better call a cab" she said, pulling her phone out. Miranda laid her hand over her phone "I've got several bedrooms that never get used. Why don't you just sleep here tonight?" She suggested.

Andrea didn't have words, it was surprising. She still was battling in her own mind if this woman has feelings for her, what Miranda's long story consisted of and if she was crazy or not. She hated feeling so confused and this didn't seem to help things.

"I suppose I could" she said finally. Miranda smiled, her posture straightening giddily like a teenage girl. "I'll show you your room and grab you something to sleep in" she said.

They walked up to the third floor and Miranda showed her to her guest bedroom. It was larger than her bedroom back at her place. The bed was decorated with fancy pillows and looked absolutely heavenly to her right now. "I like to sleep in here from time to time, it used to be the girls nursery" she pulled open the closet and grabbed another pillow for her.

"They've been staying with their father a lot more often. When Stephen and I were going through the divorce... well... the media was not kind" Miranda crossed her arms and sighed. "Once the school year starts, they'll be back with me for the weekdays" she smiled.

"I'll go grab you some clothes" she said before leaving the room. Andrea sat down on the bed and pulled off her boots. She stretched her legs and laid back on the bed. It was obscenely comfortable. She sighed and closed her eyes.

"It's great, isn't it?" Miranda said as she came back in. She sat a silky piece of clothing on the dresser and sat next to Andrea on the bed. "The comforter is from France, I bought it a few years ago while I was there" she sighed. "I might have trouble getting out of bed in the morning" Andrea joked. "Oh you will, trust me".

It was quiet now between them, the only sound that of the ceiling fan pushing the air throughout the room. Andrea sat up and looked over at the stunning woman next to her. Never in a million years did she think she'd be in a bed with Miranda, spending the night in her home. She felt like she was dreaming. Without even realizing it, they had been staring at each other. That same piercing look that made her feel vulnerable yet unafraid peered into her soul again now.

"Well, I hope you sleep well Andrea" Miranda said as she broke their gaze and stood up. Andrea stood up too. "I've really enjoyed this evening, thank you for dinner and for the drinks and for letting me stay over" the young woman told her. Miranda held out her arms and pulled her in for an embrace. "It's been my pleasure" she whispered next to her ear. Their hug lasted longer than usual, Andrea squeezed her tightly against her and the sound that came from Miranda made her heart ache.

It was moments like this that were so confusing. Was Miranda mothering her in some way? Did she see her like she sees her own girls? Does she treat her other friends as sweetly as she has treated her this evening? Was she completely insane for thinking perhaps Miranda feels more for her than something only friends do?

When they pulled apart they didn't look at each other. Miranda ducked out of the room and pulled her door closed. Once Andrea was alone she let out a deep breath that she didn't realize she had been holding all evening.

"Fuck" she whispered to herself. This was bad and yet so good. She could feel herself falling for this impossible woman and she hated not knowing if she would be there to catch her. The thought of it not being reciprocated in the same way was unbearable to even think about.

She fell asleep quickly and as promised, she had trouble rising from bed in the morning. She went downstairs and Miranda was already awake, drinking coffee and sitting in her robe at her breakfast table. Something about witnessing her in this light, getting a glimpse of the 'ice queens' every day routine made her all the more lovely. "How did you sleep?" She asked her, getting up from the table and touching her arm affectionately.

"I slept wonderfully, thank you" Andrea said, smiling. It had become more and more common for Miranda to touch her randomly and without seeming to realize it. "I made some coffee if you want some" she gestured toward the small steaming French press in the counter.

"I have to go get ready but help yourself to whatever you want" she smiled. Andrea had never seen Miranda act this way toward anyone but her children. She was startled by it. "Andrea" she said before she climbed her stairs, "yes, Miranda" the girl answered. "I'm glad you're here" she told her before she disappeared upstairs.

Andrea was left grinning like a little girl and unable to eat because her body was overly stimulated by the entire situation. She had a cup of coffee and left. She hailed a cab just outside of her house and went straight to work. She had never remembered feeling so happy in the morning, so ready to face the day.

She was busy all afternoon. A new story had broken about a New York Senator sexting and sending inappropriate pictures to multiple women. She hated covering these kind of stories but she was still working her way up the ranks at the Mirror. She volunteered to go and interview the woman who leaked the story to the press.

She arrived at a little coffee shop off of Madison and waited at a table for the woman to arrive. She felt her phone buzz and saw it was a text from Miranda.

"I forgot to ask if you have any plans this evening?"

Andrea smiled and quickly replied, "got something in mind?" She sent it and saw the woman walk into the cafe. She waved her over and invited her to sit. She bought her a latte and they sat and talked for awhile before she began the interview.

She got what she needed and said her goodbyes.

The woman was pleasant enough. She said she had leaked the info because she cared about honesty in her elected officials but Andrea knew she was full of shit.

She would not write anything differently though, she knew every New York politician has their secrets and this was far less concerning than others but she still had a job to do.

She looked at her phone and it was another text. "Be at my house by 7".

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A/N

This will probably only be about 5 chapters but I already have most of it written out so it'll be quick.

PS

 **Question for reviewers.**

 **I've always been curious, what brought the readers/writers to the Devil Wears Prada fics?**

I'm 24 and i've always loved older women in powerful positions with at least 10 year age differences from my own.  
So naturally I felt like in the movie the relationship between these two had alot more under the surface. Also, Meryl Streep. Also this fandom seems to be one of the only ones with may december lesbian relationships and tons of good stories.

Much love to you

-X


	2. Chapter 2

Andrea was not a moment late to Mirandas home. When she got there she walked up the stairs and before she could even reach the door Miranda greeted her there. "Andrea, come upstairs. I have something for you" she smiled, grabbing her hand and leading her up the three flights to her bedroom.

On the bed was a dark blue dress, laid out flat and Prada heels sat on top of them. "I wanted to do something different tonight. I grabbed these from the closet today. I think you would look great in it" she told her. Andrea was surprised and flattered. She held the dress up to her body and could see the expression on MIrandas face was excited.

"Put it on, the show starts at 8:30" she told her. "What show?" The woman asked, "That's a surprise" she smiled at her teasingly. "Put the dress on. My makeup is in the bathroom if you want to wear any. Meet me downstairs when you're finished" she pulled the door shut.

Twenty minutes later and Andrea walked down the stairs barefoot. Miranda was in the living room on the phone and watched her. Her eyes widened and then softened as she stood and observed her pulling on the tall Prada heels. "You look stunning, just as I expected" she told her. She finished her phone call and grabbed a coat from the closet in the hallway.

They went outside and Roy was already waiting for them with the car door open. "Good evening, Andy" Roy said to her with a smile. "always nice to see you" he told her. He closed the door for them and then got into the drivers seat. "Can you tell me where we're headed, Roy?" Andrea asked. She saw him grin in the rear view mirror and shake his head. "Sure cant" He pulled out into the street and headed downtown.

Miranda took Andreas hand in the backseat. Her hand felt small and soft against her own. "How was you're day, darling?" She asked her. It was not too long before they were pulling up to the curb outside of a theater. "You told me you've never seen a broadway play. I wont allow that" Miranda smiled at her.

They got out and instead of walking into the theater a woman greeted them in the lobby and lead them backstage. "What are we doing?" Andrea asked but Miranda just smiled at her without an answer. "Andrea id like you to meet a few friends of mine" she told her, motioning to a group of actors sitting in a relaxing area not far from the stage entrance.

The young woman was taken aback. She recognized several faces. Two famous actresses she had seen in films and television were among the many the two of them greeted. "Andrea has never seen a Broadway play before. I figured what better production than this to break her in" she smiled. They all laughed and told her she hoped that she has a good time.

They drank some wine with a couple of them that Miranda seemed especially close to. One of the older actresses approached Andrea when Miranda was speaking to someone else. She was nervous at first, she knew who she was, she had been on television for years.

"You're staring, sweetheart" she said to her discreetly. Andrea looked at her wide eyed and smiled "Oh, I didn't realize" she smiled shyly. "She's a force of nature, its hard not to catch feelings for her. You seem to make her happy" she told her. "She makes me happy too".

"Just be careful, doll. She might not be as in touch with her feelings as perhaps she should be" the actress warned her. "What do you mean?" Andrea felt this begged for more questions. "An old dyke knows another when she sees one" the woman laughed light heartedly. "It takes some of us longer than others to come to terms with it, you know what I mean?" She nudged her.

"Oh I'm not gay" Andrea said all too quickly. The woman looked at her sideways and smiled. "Like I said, it takes some of us longer than others. Enjoy the show sweetheart, I've got to go warmup" she told her, giving her a wink before she walked away.

A few minutes before showtime, they left the backstage area and found their seats. Andrea felt special, she felt more than any other evening this certainly felt like a date. One of the best she's ever been on. "This is amazing, Miranda" she told her.

They exchanged meaningful smiles the entire evening and during intermission Miranda introduced her to several more of her friends that sat near them.

After it was over, they waited outside for Roy to pick them up. "Are you up for some coffee? I know a great shop not far from the house" Miranda asked her.

The two young men working at the coffee shop recognized Miranda and immediately went to work on the drink she always ordered. Andrea instead of coffee opted for a hot tea instead. They seemed pleasantly surprised by Mirandas demeanor this evening. Andrea knew this kind and lighthearted Miranda, no one seemed to be used to.

They found a cozy little couch in the corner near the back of the shop. A couple of people were busy with their heads in their laptops and didn't even noticed they were there. It was an entirely lovely evening, one for the record books.

Andrea could certainly get used to living like this with Miranda. She could get used to seeing her everyday and coming home to her in the evenings. She wondered now more than ever exactly what was going on in that head of hers. Was she feeling the same way about her?

Somehow the conversation turned into something she had not imagined it to any time soon. She had always had a rule, never talk about religion or politics with someone when your just beginning to get to know them. There is a reason for such a rule.

Somehow faith was brought into what they were speaking about. "I haven't stepped foot in a church since I left Ohio" she said without much thought. "Why do you think that is?" Miranda asked her.

"Well, before coming to New York I was a baptist, mostly because of my parents. But there were several things that changed me throughout the years. I believe in God but I don't know about the whole religion thing" She tried to explain. SHe didn't want to get into specific details, she didn't want this to turn into some kind of debate. She still wanted to enjoy this evening with Miranda.

"I used to feel the same way. My father was jewish, my mother was catholic. I was raised in the church, I went to catholic school, I even attended a catholic university. I still go to mass from time to time, although in my early thirties I strayed. These last few years, I've found that Its something I need in my life" Miranda told her. Andrea could see now that her faith meant much more to her than it meant to her. "Was there something in particular that made you not wish to attend anymore?" She asked the young woman.

"Well... My best friend growing up was gay. When we first started high school, his parents sent him away for conversion therapy. Our pastor told him he was going to hell if he didn't change; the whole church found out and then his family was shunned. Then it got around to our high school and everyone turned on him there. He's okay now but he was lucky to ever make it out of that mess alive. That changed a lot of things for me" Andrea told her.

She could feel herself growing nervous now. She saw the expression change on Mirandas face, not unlike the look she had seen when she wouldn't answer whether she had feelings for women in the past.

"I'm very sorry for your friend. These things can be difficult to figure out when you call yourself a christian. I've learned alot through the years, seen much more than I cared to ever see..." She sighed and played with the rim of her coffee cup. The young woman noticed she hadn't drank much of it.

"Do you believe it's wrong?" Andrea asked. The question occurred to her because she was beginning to get the sense that she did. She had never taken Miranda to be an overly religious woman. She knew she attended church somewhat regularly but she had not expected her to have any extreme opinions. Especially considering the industry she was apart of.

"I think for two people to love each other, there is no controlling that. However acting on desires... sexual desires... is something else entirely. I think we have choices when it comes to acting on such things... we have the choice to live as God intended or to live against his will" Miranda tried to explain.

Andrea was not sure how to respond to this at first. She took it in and tried to relax into the couch. This made her stomach sink, not only did she not understand such ideas, she realized then that Miranda was likely not interested in her romantically.

This was something she felt passionately about though, it was no small thing to her that she felt this way about homosexuality. "I think if two people are lucky enough to find each other in this world, to fall in love... it is not wrong whatsoever for them to express that love to each other" She said confidently. Miranda smiled sadly and nodded.

"Love is a wonderful thing and I wouldn't wish anyone to deny that for themselves but we have choices and God has been clear about what he desires for us" Miranda said softly, cautiously, as if she was afraid that the words would offend her. "If God created us as we are, then why would he create someone with these feelings, only to condemn them for it?" Andrea asked her bluntly.

She felt differently then, her opinion, her view of who she thought Miranda was had changed. She perhaps wasn't who she thought she was at all. Perhaps she had misinterpreted their evenings together completely. Then she thought about her conversation with the actress before the play. Was this what she meant when she said Miranda wasn't quite in touch with her feelings?

"That's a good question" Miranda conceded. Their eyes locked for a long time and Andrea smiled nervously, not sure what else to say or to do. She was ready for this conversation to end. They didn't agree about something that was fundamental to Andrea and it was taking her a long while to process the meaning of it.

Andrea looked at her watch and saw that it was nearly midnight. "They'll be closing up soon. Should we head back to your house?" She suggested. They climbed back into the car together and were silent most of the drive back, though it wasn't far at all.

Once inside Andrea went upstairs to Mirandas bedroom and tried to take off the dress. She was finding she couldn't quite get it off. She went into Mirandas study just down the hall and asked her to help her unzip it. She couldn't deny that a part of her wanted to test her, gauge her reaction to helping her undress.

Miranda slid the zipper down her back. She heard her take a deep breath behind her. "It looks beautiful on you,Andrea. Why don't you keep it?" She told her before sitting back down in her chair. Turning to look at her, holding up the front of the dress, she noticed that she was slightly flushed and looking away from her. Perhaps intentionally.

"Miranda, I couldn't.. its too expensive" Andrea protested. "Nonsense, I want you to keep it" she insisted. "Wow, thank you. I don't think I could ever repay you". Miranda looked up at her finally and smiled crookedly, "You don't have to but if you want to... I'm sure you'll think of something" she winked.

Andrea left that evening feeling strangely different about Miranda. On the edge of where she was, worshiping the ground she walked on, to feeling sad about her. Their conversation at the coffee shop, combined with her unwillingness to share about whether she's been with women in the past has made her feel confused about exactly who Miranda really is. Perhaps she doesn't know her as well as she thought she did.

She knew now, if she had any hope of saving herself from heartache, she should stop seeing her this often. It would never be what she wanted. If Miranda doesn't believe two women should be together physically then she knows her hope for ever having a romantic relationship with her is only a fantasy.

Yet still, Miranda invited her to dinner at least once a week and Andrea could never seem to tell her no. The truth was, she looked forward to them. Even lived for them. Just being in her presence made her feel better, made her feel alive and happy like she had never felt before. Not even with Nate.

She hated to admit it, but as the weeks wore on like this, she was falling in love with this woman. And it was tearing her apart. She had to tell her soon, or she knew this would drive her insane.


	3. Chapter 3

One Friday evening after a particularly taxing week, Miranda and Andrea met at a wine bar uptown. They were already tipsy when they left and Miranda had invited her back to the townhouse for another round. They ended up on her sofa, talking. Like they always do. But Andrea was feeling herself brave, unlike other nights.

"Miranda, I need to tell you something" she said suddenly. Miranda looked surprised, concerned even. "What is it?" She asked. The words were on her lips, burning on her tongue but she was so afraid to speak them that she nearly bailed out.

"I have to be honest with you... I'm beginning to have these feelings" she started, Miranda perked up and the look on her face was morphing to an unreadable expression. "What feelings?" She pushed. "Feelings for you.. romantic feelings . I know you don't reciprocate. I... I just needed to get it off of my chest" she confessed.

Miranda said nothing for a long moment, mulling over the words and taking in what she had just said. "I see" she said softly, looking away. Her mind seemed to slip into a memory, her eyes were just staring. "I must be honest with you... this is unexpected" she told her. "I'm sorry, I've just made things so weird" Andrea said, covering her face with embarrassment.

"I think of you often Andrea" she told her. Her voice was soft and gentle, she came closer to her and pulled her hands from her face. "You haven't made me uncomfortable in the slightest" she smiled. The impulse was too strong, her drunkenness to powerful to stop her rational mind, Andrea leaned forward and pulled her face close to hers.

"Andrea... please" Miranda whispered. Andreas lips were so close, so close to touching hers that she could feel her warm breath. "I want you, Miranda" she told her.

The woman whimpered and pulled her in to hug her, turning her cheek so to take the temptation from her view. She squeezed her tightly against her body and the sweet sound Andrea loved so much was loud against her ear. "Oh sweetheart" she said sadly.

"I love being close to you but darling... you and I... we couldn't" she pulled away from her and held her face. "I don't want this to change us, what we have. I love having you in my life... I just... I can't". Andrea had never felt so sorry for another person in her life. There is something between them, something beautiful and pure yet Miranda has chosen to deny herself the freedom to feel it completely.

"I will always want more, I'll always look at you and want you in a way that I shouldn't... I can't go on torturing myself every time I'm around you" she wiped away her tears and pulled away from Mirandas hands. Her eyes focused on her lips and that very desire washed over her again, that instinct to kiss this beautiful woman.

"I feel it, Andrea I have these feelings for you that I can't control but..." she began again but Andrea stopped her "you can't be with me.. I know". Mirandas heart sank, she knew this young woman was hurting and seconds from walking out of her front door.

That was the last thing she wanted right now. She knew the turmoil inside her own heart that was stirred up again by these forbidden feelings were making her entire body ache with exhaustion.

"I couldn't stand it if you left, please... darling don't leave now" Miranda begged. She never begged anyone, not ever. These feelings, feelings she promised to push away if they ever arose again were coming back to her with a vengeance.

"I've fallen in love with you and this right now... it's too much for me" the young woman told her.

"In love..." Miranda repeated. "I can't help it. You're the most amazing, wonderful, beautiful woman I've ever known" Andrea said sadly, her eyes were red now, wet and wide with emotion.

"Well I'm sure that isn't true" Miranda said dismissively. "It is, trust me." Andrea tried to pull away "I have to go, I'm sorry Miranda" she said suddenly. She headed toward her front door but Miranda wouldn't let her go far.

She hugged the young woman against her again. She held her tightly, trying to convey just how much she doesn't wish her to leave. She whimpered next to her ear. "Andrea... I'm so sorry I can't give you what you need" she squeezed her tighter, wanting her to feel it's the truth.

Andrea felt her heart ache at her words, she couldn't stand this. She had to let her go if she was going to maintain her sanity. The thought of leaving these beautiful moments behind was unbearable. She wanted nothing more Than to run away but Miranda wasn't letting her.

When they pulled away they stared at each other. Mirandas hands were at her cheeks, her eyes welling with tears, glistening an impossible blue. Andrea laid her hands over Mirandas. She rested her forehead against hers.

"Why won't you admit to yourself what you're feeling" Andrea asked, breathing deeply but erratically. "I admit that I love you... cant that be enough?" Miranda was battling her will to be the woman she thinks she should be. There is another woman inside of her she's kept silent for years and in this instant she burns to escape, to be free.

"Not when I feel like I'll die if I never kiss your lips" Andrea groaned. "If I can never hold you" Her body and heart was aching with these desires, these feelings of love that must be expressed. "Oh darling" she was breathing heavily, fighting back tears.

Then without warning, Andrea kissed her. Their Satin soft lips collided, lungs heaved from the intensity of the feeling.

It was a relief, a thrill and everything she had imagined it to be. She opened her mouth and held Miranda tighter, she tasted her breath, the wine and the reluctance. The older woman moaned when she felt Andreas tongue, her entire body was hot, her heart racing a million miles a second.

Andrea pushed her gently against the wall in the foyer. Miranda shook and pulled her mouth away, she was nearly hyperventilating. "Oh I- I'm so sorry" the older woman cries, covering her face. "What we have together... it's not wrong" Andrea implored.

Miranda wept into her hands, she sank down into the floor, crying uncontrollably. "Oh Miranda, I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have pushed you" she apologized, feeling unbearable guilt wash over her. She had not expected her actions to completely break Miranda down. She didn't want this to happen.

"A decade ago... I fell in love with a woman... I had just had the girls and I was leaving their father. She was a counselor at my church. She helped me get through the divorce" Miranda gathered her knees against her chest, her eyes staring and revisiting a painful point in her past.

"She was married but we made promises to be together, to raise our children together one day. We spent nearly every free moment together, her husband traveled often so it was easy" Miranda stopped and her hands tightened around her head, as if she wished to squeeze the next memory from its place in her mind, to crush it from existence.

"Miranda you don't have to talk about this if you don't want to" The young woman told her, seeing how it was affecting her physically, seeing the emotion and trauma so apparent in her features made Andreas heart ache for her. Miranda shook her head. "I want you to understand" she said before she continued.

"One evening her husband came home early from a business trip... he found us together in their bed" Miranda sobbed and took a long moment to gather herself. Andrea sat closer to her, grabbing her hands.

"He screamed at me, at her. He told me to get out of his house so I did... I ran, I left and I didn't even look back. I should have stayed... I should have made her come with me..." Andreas heart sank in her chest like a stone through deep water. She had a terrible feeling about what she was going to tell her next.

"I sat by my phone all night hoping she would call me, tell me she was alright... The next morning... I find out from the news that he... he killed her. He beat her for hours in front of their children and then he shot her and then himself" Miranda cried so hard she sounded like she was going to pass out.

Andrea gathered her in her arms and let her cry. "I saw it all as a sign from God, there were dyer consequences for doing what we had done... for what we had done with each other" she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Miranda... I'm so sorry. Jesus, I had no idea" Andrea took her hands and held them, reaching up to wipe the tears from her face as more poured from her. "I've never told anyone about her and I. It's always been too painful".

Miranda calmed down after awhile. Andrea helped her up off the floor. They went back into the living room and sat down on the couch together, Andrea holding her there. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean for you to see me like that" The older woman said after a long while.

"You don't ever have to apologize for anything like that. I'm glad you shared it with me" Andrea told her, smoothing her hair away from her face and behind her ear. "I'm sorry for kissing you" she told her. Miranda sat up and smiled, her face was surprisingly close to hers. "I liked kissing you" she told her, staring at her lips. "It just... brought back memories I wasn't quite prepared for" she told her.

"Come to bed with me" the older woman whispered to her. Traces of her sadness still lingered on her face, the red eyes and wet face "Miranda are you sure..." Andrea began but she stopped her with another kiss.

"I don't want to be alone tonight... darling... I want to be with you but I will need time" Miranda told her. Andrea nodded and smiled, tears welling in her own eyes. "I can do that".


	4. Chapter 4

They laid together in Mirandas bed, it was even more comfortable than the guest bedroom. Especially with Mirandas arms wrapped around her and holding her tight against her like she might slip away. They fell asleep like this and Andrea had never felt such happiness in her life, even though she felt some guilt in pushing her this evening, she knew these feelings between them, no God of love would condemn.

In the morning Miranda whispered into her ear "Andrea, darling", waking her up. The girl woke, feeling the woman's soft hand glide across her arm, gently rousing her from her sleep. She turned over and was met with a smile. "Mmm good morning, MIranda" she hummed contentedly.

The older woman smiled and hesitated for a moment but she pulled her lips to her own and kissed her. THe young woman combed her fingers through her short silver hair and kissed her deeper, her heart rate picked up immediately, sending a burst of energy throughout her veins. Andrea felt her warm palm rest on her abdomen, with her lips pressed so sweetly against her own it made her body shiver.

"Are you cold? You're trembling" Miranda whispered against her lips. Taking a deep breath trying to calm her nerves she smiled nervously "No... you know I'm not" Andrea swept the hair hanging in front of Mirandas eyes away from her face, taking in her bare beauty, no makeup, just woken from sleep, lips red from their kiss. She was still breathtaking. "This is not going to be easy for me" she whispered, admiring her red swollen lips and thinking of how they would feel all over her body.

Miranda stared down at her. Something was different this morning. She didn't look quite the same. She seemed to be glowing. MIranda bit her lip and her hand slid lower. "I never said it would be easy" her breathing picked up and she kissed Andrea again, slowly, agonizingly so, as if they had nothing but time.

Andrea shook harder, her entire body on fire and her heart thundering against her chest. Her hand slid beneath her blouse and glided over her stomach, so feather soft that her skin broke out in goose bumps. "You're so beautiful" she heard her whisper against her lips.

The momentum was building but Miranda had control. She never picked up her pace, only her breath gave any indication that she was feeling just as aroused as Andrea. "I know what you need, darling" she told her, her fingernails scratching gently across her hip. "I want to give it to you but...". She kissed Andrea again, and slid her tongue gently across them. "As long as I can be with you Miranda, take as long as you need".

It was an unbearably long day at the office. Andrea was asked to cover the upcoming protests against troops being sent into Iran. She was trying to get everything prepared for it but all she could think about was Miranda and looking forward to seeing her that evening.

It was nearly eight in the evening before Andrea got off work. When she got to MIrandas house she was in her kitchen, working away at the stove preparing dinner.

"I wanted to do something special for you tonight, I wanted to make you dinner" she told her. Andrea sat her things down on her counter and pulled Miranda close to her.

She looked so cute in her apron, bare foot and sweating slightly over a pan of sautéed vegetables. Andrea kissed her neck, inhaling the scent of her violet scented perfume. "I've been thinking about you all day" she told her. Miranda giggled and turned down the burner before she turned toward her and caressed her face.

"I've been thinking about you too" she smiled, before she kissed her lips. She turned back to what she was cooking. "There's a bottle of Malbec I opened earlier, glasses are above the sink if you want to help yourself" Miranda told her.

Andrea pulled a glass down and poured herself a generous glass of the dark purple liquid. "I wanted to talk to you tonight" The older woman said, going over to the oven to check on the chicken. "The girls will be coming back to stay with me in about a week" She pulled the pan out of the oven and the scent of the meat filled the kitchen that made Andreas stomach growl.

"I don't want to thrust this on them the moment they get back but... I do want them to know how much you mean to me" she told her. She rested against the counter for a moment. "I want to take them on a little trip to our home in the Hamptons next weekend. Will you join us?".

She pulled down plates from her cabinets and started plating the food. "I'd love to. Work might get a little crazy this week but hopefully it will die down by then" Andrea was surprised that Miranda wanted her girls to know about them.

It was only last night that they had agreed to see where this would take them. She couldn't help but feel like the sun was glowing from inside her soul. She wants nothing more than to be closer to Miranda and her girls.

They ate dinner together and drank their wine. They laid back in her upstairs living room and watched a movie together. It felt wonderfully normal. Somewhere in the middle of the movie though, Andrea had fallen asleep against Miranda. The day had been so long and exhausting that she had no idea she had done it.

Miranda didn't want to move. The movie had ended and it was nearly one in the morning but she wanted to soak in the moment just a bit longer. This girl has ended up meaning so much more to her than she ever imagined.

The woman she was with several years ago, their evenings were similar. Miranda would visit her in the evenings, their children would play together and She would always end up curled next to her while they watched television. It was an aching feeling now to have something similar to her again. To have it now with Andrea.

There wasn't that fear underlying everything this time though. That fear that her husband would find out, that their children would figure them out, that their church would shun them for their affair. This with Andrea was right, for all the wrong that her relationship had been years ago, for all the fallout that had convinced her it was wrong to want a woman this way... this between her and Andrea, it was beautiful.

She gently woke Andrea and guided her half asleep body into her bedroom. She helped her pull off her boots. "It's too hot to sleep in pants" she said tiredly, unbuttoning her jeans and pulling them down as well. She crawled into Mirandas bed in her underwear and shirt, right under her covers and fell back asleep. As if she was right at home.

The older woman laughed at her and changed into a nightgown before she crawled into bed beside her. She wrapped her arm around her and sighed with contentment. Her whole body relaxed, every muscle ad she fell fast asleep curled behind Andrea.

The next morning the early light filled her bedroom Just before her alarm went off. They both stirred and Miranda tugged Andrea closer. The young woman groaned. "Mmm good morning" she sighed. "Indeed, a very good morning" she whispered behind her, close to her ear.

"I've got a big night tonight. I'm sure i'll be out all night" Andrea told her disappointedly. "I'll miss you" Miranda said smiling. Andrea sat up and stretched, trying to prepare herself mentally for the day ahead,

They got up and Miranda went into her bathroom to take a shower. She heard her turn on the water. She left the door open and looked over her shoulder at Andrea while she slid off her robe.

The young woman watched the silk fall over her skin and pool at her feet. The older woman's complexion was perfect, the curve of her back and the roundness of her bum in white lace panties was making her heart race again.

"Are you coming?" She heard her voice echo off of the tiles. Andrea nodded and followed her. When Miranda turned around, her breasts were in full view. "Miranda..." she whimpered.

The young woman shivered, her hands dying to reach out and touch her, to caress her perfect skin. The older woman didn't say a word, she came closer and her hands slid beneath her blouse, pulling it up over her head and off of her.

"I want to see you" she whispered, kissing her gently on her cheek as she reached down to her underwear and slowly hooked her fingers passed the waistband "You're going to kill me" Andrea whimpered.

"Deep breaths my darling" she told her as her panties slid down her legs. Mirandas soft hands slid over her hips, pulling her into her naked body.

"You are so beautiful, Miranda" Andreas hands caressed her back, down to her lace underwear, her fingers sliding under the material to slide them down her legs too.

They held each other under the streams of water, just enjoying the feel of their bare skin against each other. Andrea kissed her shoulder, her neck and tried to remember to breathe. Mirandas breasts against her own, her body pressed against her, it was almost too much to bare but she tried her hardest not to touch where she shouldn't.

Miranda pumped shampoo into her hands and ran her fingers through Andreas hair, massaging her scalp and cleansing her thick heavy mane. The feel of her gentle fingers and the scent of her shampoo... she didn't know how Miranda expected her to survive this.

They continued their rituals. Andrea washed Mirandas hair and spread the conditioner on too. When Miranda began washing her body, her hands sliding over her back and then her breasts, she couldn't help but moan. She pulled Miranda into her body and shivered violently.

"Oh baby" Miranda whimpered, her hands continuing to touch her, to spread the soap all over her. She pulled them both beneath the water and all of the body wash slid off of her body. Andrea pulled her mouth to her own, kissing her deeply, the older woman moaned too. Her thigh slipped between her legs, her hands caressing her breasts. The feeling of her tongue sliding into her mouth was all the girls body needed.

She gasped and cried out, her legs giving way beneath her. Miranda caught her, she pressed her gently against the cool tiles and kissed her again, gently, sweetly, calming her down. "Did you just..." Miranda whispered above her lips.

"I couldn't help it. God Miranda, how can you stand this?" Andrea breathed heavily. The older woman's skin was red, her eyes dilated and glazed over. She said nothing, she kissed Andrea again.

"Touch me" she whispered, placing her hands around her waist. Andrea complied, she tried to be as gentle as Miranda but she didn't have it in her. She kissed Mirandas neck, her hands gliding over her breasts and caressing them, her palms feeling her nipples harden beneath them.

Miranda gasped and shuddered. Her hand slid lower, down her torso toward the curls between her legs. Her breathing changed and she pulled Andreas mouth to hers again. When her fingers slid through her folds and gently caressing her most sensitive area, Miranda wailed against her lips, her knees shivering and her hips convulsing. "Oh god" she whimpered over and over.

They kissed and caressed each other under the steaming shower, rinsing the rest of their soap and conditioner from their bodies. When they got out Miranda wasted no time drying off. She pulled her back into her bedroom and pushed Andrea onto the bed.

She laid ontop of her, the woman she had suppressed inside of her for nearly a decade was out in full force now, unafraid of the light and sick of the darkness. Andrea was gasping and whimpering with nearly every breath. Miranda was touching her, kissing her everywhere and it wouldn't be long before she made her come again, and this time intentionally.

Andrea gasped in surprise when Miranda settled between her legs and began kissing her breasts and down her torso. She had her legs spread, her center was impossibly wet. "I haven't done this in years" Miranda told her shyly.

Andrea caressed her face, "oh Miranda, It doesn't have to be perfect... I'm so close already" she whimpered. The older woman smiled and continued her path down Andreas body.

She hovered over her center, questioning herself one last time. "Please, oh please Miranda... make love to me" Andrea groaned. That was all the encouragement she needed.

Once she got the first taste she was lightheaded, euphoric with these feelings. She licked her gently and with her own body on the verge of climax. She gasped into her folds, it was all so heavenly all so wonderful. She had missed this, missed the touch and taste of a woman.

Andrea was writhing, her mouth open and moaning obscenities. Miranda couldn't think of a more perfect woman, a more beautiful young woman to show her the way back to who she was and what she truly wanted and needed. This was meant to be, fate had brought them together.

All within moments Andreas legs shook and her hips convulsed against Mirandas lips. She cried and sobbed her name.

She climbed back up her body and kissed her sweetly on her lips, slowly, coming down from the highs they had just been together. "I love you, I love you so much" Andrea whimpered. "My sweet girl... I love you too".

They laid together there, hair still damp and there bodies still thrumming. Miranda stroked her hair away from her face, her hands caressing her cheek, her thumb gently gliding over her full lips.

"I'm going to ask you something and I know it's going to sound crazy" Miranda said. Andrea wasn't sure what to expect. "What is it?"she asked seriously.

"Would you... ever consider..." Miranda began but wavered. Andrea held her hand that was still caressing her face. "Ask me" she encouraged her. The older woman looked into her eyes, into her soul "getting married?" She asked finally, barely above a whisper.

Andrea gasped, sitting up and smiling so hard she could barely speak. "To you? Are you serious?" Miranda sat up and smiled shyly. "I'm very serious. It... it wouldn't be easy. The press would have a field day with would not be kind... but...".

"Miranda... I would be honored to be your wife... but why would you put yourself through that kind of scrutiny... just to be with me?" Andrea would marry this woman in a heartbeat but she was surprised that things had taken such a turn from yesterday. "Not now but in the future... I would love for you to live with me and my girls, to come home to you every evening, to wake up to you every morning... to accompany me to parties and events... I could see myself being very happy with you, for a long time" she confessed.

These last couple of days had made her realize several things. Perhaps she was so unhappy all of these years because she was trying to be something she wasn't. She wasn't a straight woman, the men in her life had never given her the same contentment she had found with that woman several years ago or even now with Andrea.

Her marriages in the past had been about business, had been about her image and the very least about love. She doesn't want to live like that anymore. She doesn't want to live an inauthentic life. She would be turning fifty next year. The years she has left, she wants to spend being happy and free. What she has felt these last few weeks with Andrea has been nothing short of Nirvana.

Andrea had been right, the whole time. This kind of love between them, it was not wrong. It was beautiful. To expect anyone to be content to love someone this way without expressing it to one another was what was wrong. It would be cruel to ask anyone to do such a thing. The relationship she had had years ago had ended so terribly because she was with a taken woman. She was trapped inside of a violent marriage. God had nothing to do with the way it ended.

She felt that Andrea had been brought to her for a reason. She had left her in Paris right when she needed her, just to show her what life without Andrea was like after having her. She had come back to her for a reason and she had stayed for a reason. God wanted this woman in her life, wanted Miranda to understand something that she had misunderstood so long ago.

Heaven was not just a place to strive for after life, but while she's living it. With people who mean the most. When you find a love like this, in it you find a small piece of heaven and that is what is so truly rare.

To let it go out of fear would be foolish. Life is not always about self discipline or suppressing unwanted desire, it is about finding fulfillment and finding someone to love. No matter what people would say, or do to them, Miranda would not run away from this again. She was not sure if she was a lesbian or how to label herself now, but she is sure of one thing. She is in love with Andrea.

* * *

A/N

Just one more chapter to go. Might be a couple days. I'm fairly busy this week but I'm updating other stories.

I'm very glad you've taken the time to read my story. :)

-X


	5. Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5

It was a beautiful morning, crisp and clear. Miranda and Andrea were driving to the editors house in East Hampton, New York.

Cassidy and Caroline were sitting quietly in the backseat with their headphones in their ears and staring into their phones.

They seemed excited that Andrea was coming to the beach house with them. Though when their father dropped them off at their house it had not been an entirely pleasant encounter.

-/-/-

"Who is this?" He had asked when he came in with the girls and had set down their bags in the living room. Andrea had been sitting in the kitchen at the table with her laptop, working on an assignment. She peeked out into the entryway and watched Miranda with her girls.

"Andy!" The girls exclaimed as they noticed her sitting there. They ran over to her and hugged her "hey girls!" She said excitedly. The young woman smiled from ear to ear and hugged them back. It had been well over a year since she last saw them.

"This is my... friend, Andrea" Miranda told him. "She used to work at runway afew months ago". He raised his eyebrow at her, "the one that left you during fashion week?" His voice was surprised and curious. The girls must have told their father about her, Miranda had been a mess during that time and it wasn't because of the divorce.

"Yes, that's the one" Miranda said without looking at him "she's coming with us this weekend" she said speaking to the twins. The girls jumped up and down with excitement.

Their dad looked between them suspiciously. "Can I talk to you for a moment?" He had his hands on his hips, trying to control his features. Miranda didn't answer immediately but she nodded her head.

She led him down the hall and outside to her back patio. It was cold outside but she wanted this conversation to be short. When she closed the door he looked at her in a way that made her angry.

"What is this, Miranda? What are you doing?" He asked, crossing his arms, trying to warm himself. She stared at him, thinking of what she would say. She didn't want to tell him the truth yet, she was afraid. She didn't want to risk their custody agreement.

"Andrea is going through a hard time and I know the girls adore her so I invited her to come with us this weekend. It's not a big deal and frankly, it's none of your business" she crossed her arms too, closing herself off. She shouldn't have lied but it seemed to fall out of her mouth.

A gust of arctic wind blew through her back yard and they both shivered. "Since when did you care what your employees are 'going through'?" He asked her suspiciously. "This girl left you in Paris during the biggest week of your year and now your best friends? I just don't understand what you're doing" he looked confused, the skin of his face was turning red in the cold.

"She was one of the best assistants I've ever had. I ran into her a couple months ago and we've become friends. It's as simple as that" Miranda answered him with annoyance heavy in her voice. "Why do you care so much?" She countered.

"They're my kids and I don't want them getting attached to a girl who isn't likely to stick around long. You have a reputation for running people off" he said rudely. Her eye brows furrowed and she worked hard not to blow up at him.

"And what of the young women that come in and out of your life? You don't seem concerned about the girls when it comes to that. Why don't you mind your own goddamn business, Richard?" She said before she went back inside.

The conversation was over, she didn't want to continue it. It wouldn't go any where productive. This was typical of him to try to control every single situation. It was why they didn't work out. Two people who refused to give up control could never flourish together.

"Alright girls, say bye to your father, he has to get back to Jersey before traffic" she told the twins. He sighed and shook hishead, looking at Andrea out of the corner of his eye. "Bye daddy" they said, uninterested, from the kitchen. They were sitting at the table with Andrea and showing her pictures on their iPads.

-/-/-

When they got to East Hampton they stopped in a small grocery store to pick up the ingredients for their dinner that evening. Miranda had walked off from the girls to ask the butcher at the back for a cut of meat. She was surprised when she saw a boy similar in age to her girls staring at her. He was an odd boy, he was staring at her as if he knew her. Miranda didn't know what to do. She smiled at him awkwardly.

"Is your name Miranda?" The child asked her. She suddenly felt shock hit her in the chest like a truck.

"Yes..." she answered slowly. An older woman came up behind him, smiling and she looked so much like the woman that Miranda had been in love with years ago that it nearly sent her into a panic. "Hey, Bryan, are you bothering this woman?" The lady said just before she met Mirandas eyes. Her features sank from a smile to anger.

"You..." she said, her voice cracking with emotion and rage. "You knew my mom, didn't you?" The boy asked Miranda. At this point, she was fighting back tears. She could feel her face going white. "Bryan, why don't you go pick out some cereal, alright?" The woman told him. "But..." he tried to argue "just do it" she said firmly.

He looked back at Miranda one last time, his eyes were just like his mothers and the way they looked at her, with confusion and with sadness, nearly broke her heart. When he was out of ear shot, the woman in front of her crossed her arms. She looked so much like her when she was angry.

"I know who you are. I know you and my sister had a... close relationship" she told her. Her distaste for her was palpable. There was no mistaking it. For the first time in her life, Miranda was at a loss for words. "I... I'm sorry" was all she could think to say.

The woman teared up. "You know, her husband treated her like she was nobody and all she ever talked about was you. She said you made her happy. I tried to tell her That it wouldn't end well" she wiped tears from her eyes. Mirandas eyes were wide and full of fear for what she might say next.

"That night... she had called me... I could hear him screaming at her over the phone. I could hear her begging him not to beat her anymore" she said. "She told me that he had found out about you... how could you? You knew how crazy he was and you couldn't leave her alone" she was sobbing and fizzling with anger. Her face was beat red.

"Please" Miranda said, needing her to stop speaking. She began crying, hyperventilating right there in the store. "If it weren't for you... my sister would still be alive, my nephew would still have his mother..." the woman yelled at her. Andrea rounded the corner and saw Miranda sinking to the floor, her knees giving way beneath her. "Miranda!" She called out, she ran to her, trying to catch her.

"I hope she has suffered for what she did to my family" The woman wouldn't stop. Andrea helped Miranda back to her feet. "Hey, that's enough!" Andrea yelled back at the woman. "Bryan?" Caroline said, seeing the same boy from earlier standing at the end of the cereal isle with a box of fruit loops in his hands.

He began to smile toward them but his aunt rushed over to him, taking his hand and turning him around. "Don't talk to them" she told him. He yanked his hand away from her "They're my friends! Why are you being so mean?" He yelled at her. He dropped the box of cereal and ran away from her.

He ran out of the store and out of sight. She gave Miranda and Andrea one last scathing look and followed after him.

"Are you okay, Miranda? Who the hell was that?" Andrea asked her, her own heart racing with rage and confusion. "That... was the sister of the woman I was with years ago... and that little boy... was her son" she managed between breaths. She held her hand over her heart. Her chest ached, her heart feeling like it was splitting in half. All she could think about was that beautiful woman, bruised and bloody and begging for her life. All because she couldn't leave well enough alone. She hated her self more than she ever had.

Andrea told the girls to take Miranda out to the car and wait for her while she finished the shopping. She could feel eyes on her the entire time. The woman had made such a scene that the whole grocery store had heard the encounter. She got what she needed quickly and checked out.

While loading the car she saw a police cruiser pull up. She noticed the woman that had made Miranda dissolve into panic was in tears and panicking herself. Andrea could hear what she was saying to the officer.

"My nephew ran off and I cant find him" she told the man in the police cruiser. She heard him tell the woman that they would put out an amber alert and he would check the area for him. When he pulled away, she watched the woman stand there, sobbing into her hands.

She closed the trunk of the car and motioned to Miranda that she would be a moment. She stuffed her hands into the pocket of her jacket and took a deep breath. She walked over to the woman. "Is there anything we can do to help?" Andrea asked her. The woman was startled.

"You can leave me alone" she said curtly. Andrea sighed. "I know you lost your sister in a horrible way and I cant begin to imagine what that might feel like and the fear you must be feeling now that your nephew has run off... I... I just wanted you to know something" Andrea told her as gently as possible. "What?" She seemed to let go of a bit of that anger.

"Miranda loved your sister and what happened to her... it wasn't her fault but she has lived with the guilt ever since. You know that the only person responsible for what happened to your sister was her husband. He took your sister away from you. All Miranda did was love her" Andrea told her. The woman's face broke into tears, she hid it from Andrea and sobbed.

The young woman took a chance and wrapped her arms around her, knowing she probably needed a hug more than anyone else right now. "I'm sorry I freaked out on her... please tell her that" The woman sobbed.

Moments later the police cruiser pulled up again and this time, he opened the back door and let Bryan out of the back. "We found him walking on the road about a mile from here" he told his aunt. She rushed over to him and hugged him. "Jesus, you scared the shit out of me! Don't ever do that again" she told him. "I'm sorry" he told her.

The woman took out a piece of paper and wrote something on it. She handed it to Andrea and smiled sadly at her. "If Caroline and Cassidy ever want to spend time with Bryan... just give me a call" she led the boy away from her and he looked back at Andrea curiously. He waved over his shoulder at the twins and gave them a sweet smile.

When she got back in the car, Miranda was silent for a long while. After they had gotten to the house and put away the groceries and they were alone for a moment, Andrea handed her the number that the woman had given her. "She wanted me to tell you that she was sorry for what she said in the store and if the girls ever want to see Bryan, that you can call her".

Miranda took the number and put it in her pocket. "Ill speak with the girls about it later" she said, smoothing her hair away and trying not to tear up again. "Andrea... I..." She began but faltered. "What is it?" Andrea asked, worried. "I love you" She said, sadness in her voice, melancholy in her tone but hope floating somewhere in the sound. The girl smiled, pulling her in to her arms. "I love you too" she said softly.

The next morning the girls played in the sand near the water. It was far too cold to swim in it but the girls loved to explore up and down the beach. Around noon, their doorbell rang and Andrea answered it. Bryan and his Aunt stood on the front step, smiling and holding a pie that she had made them, out of guilt more than anything.

"Come on in, We're glad you're here" Miranda said as she walked up behind Andrea. She took the pie from the woman's hands and led them into the kitchen. Although it felt strange at first, they all became comfortable around the table at lunch.

They laughed and shared stories, the children giggling in their own conversations. It felt as if the incident at the store yesterday had never happened. After lunch, Bryan and the girls went outside to play. Miranda sliced the pie and fixed a cup of coffee for Andrea and their guest.

They watched the children play out of the back window of the house while they sipped their steaming mugs. "Are you two together?" She asked them suddenly, staring between the two of them. They looked at each other hesitantly but Miranda smiled. "We're still working that out" she answered her.

The woman nodded and smiled uncomfortably. "Do you still think about her?" She asked, her voice breaking "Because I always do". Miranda sighed, "everyday" she told her. The woman stared out the window at her young nephew playing in the sand with the two redheads. Her eyes sinking into a memory of her sister. "She loved you... so much more than she ever loved him" she said softly. "She would want you to be happy" she looked back at them. "You two look happy together".

Later that evening, Bryan and his aunt left with promises to see them again. It was amazing how therapeutic the entire day had been. It was something that Miranda had desperately needed and had not even realized it.

The four of them sat around the table together, dinner steaming on their plates. "Bobseys... Andrea and I wanted to tell you something" Miranda began, waiting to begin her meal. "What's that, mommy?" Cassidy asked her. "These last couple of months I have been spending a lot of time with Andrea. Over time mommy has started to have feelings... that are more than feelings two friends share" she explained.

"What does that mean?" The teen asked her, her fork stuck in her food but staring at her mother. She had their full attention now. "It means that Andrea is my girlfriend and that I love her very much" she told them. They stared at Andrea, who was holding Mirandas hand and looking at the two of them hopefully.

"That's weird" Caroline said, laughing uncomfortably. "Why is it weird, bobsey?" Miranda asked her. The girl stopped smiling and rested her head on her hand, thinking deeply about what her mother had just asked her. "So you're into girls? What about Stephen... what about daddy?" Cassidy looked so confused that it made Miranda feel slightly guilty.

"When you grow older, you'll discover that sometimes love can be found in unexpected places. You'll discover that sometimes its not as simple as girls only like boys... life is so much more complicated than that. I love Andrea and many years ago... I loved Bryans mother" she took a deep breath. She realized her heart was thumping inside her furiously.

"I'm okay with it, I like Andy" Caroline told her, shrugging and getting back to her food. She seemed less concerned about it than Cassidy. "Cass?" Miranda looked at her, wondering what other questions she might have. "I guess its Okay... its still a bit.. weird" she said. Andrea could see the hurt in Mirandas face as she sat up and picked up her silverware. "Well... thank you both for listening" she told them.

They ate in relative silence for awhile. It was awkward and nagging, begging to be filled. Soon the table was buzzing with idle talk about the day and about what the girls did with Bryan. After dinner, the girls went up to their bedroom while Miranda and Andrea cleaned up.

"Hey, she'll come around" Andrea told her, rubbing her back soothingly as she scrubbed their plates clean. "It went better than I thought..." a long silence passed between them, Miranda saying nothing, deep in her thoughts. "Caroline doesn't seem to care either way" Andrea laughed. "Well... i have some doubts about her own sexuality... the girl is slightly obsessed with Ellen" Andrea joked, Miranda laughed too.

That night, Miranda and Andrea laid beneath her heavy duvet, the sound of the ocean muted behind the French doors to their second story balcony.

They kissed slowly, taking their time, reveling in the feel of one another. "I could lay here with you forever" Andrea whispered to a glowing Miranda. She was breathtaking in the full moon light streaming in through their windows. Her face free of makeup and her eyes gentle as they watched her.

"I'm so glad you're here" Miranda told her. "In my life... in my bed. I meant it when I said I love you" Miranda told her again. Her heart couldn't feel more full than when she is with her. "I feel the same way, completely. I love you too" the young woman told her.

Things were far from perfect but they felt for the first time that they were well on their way to some kind of perfection together. Both women were afraid of the future and simultaneously excited for it. Miranda for one, had never felt this way about another person. Not even with that woman so many years ago.

In this with Andrea, there was hope, there was happiness and understanding. There was patience and a love she had never believed to be true.

Her young, soft hands caressed her beneath their blankets, bringing her to orgasm while she fought to silence herself in crook of her shoulder.

A peaceful, restful sleep came to both of them that night. This place with the twins, on the beach, so far from the noise of the city felt like heaven on earth and both would be content to never leave it again.

this is is the conclusion to this story. This one was very close to my heart. I appreciate the reviews. Thank you very much for choosing to read my story.

-X


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